Tampa Bay Rants and Raves (TBRR) is a weekly chronicle of politics, sports, lifestyle and historical notes from a politically incorrect viewpoint. Caution, some of this content should not be taken literally.

First thing on our mind:

After a couple of near 1000 word missives the past two weeks, we owe you a “slim fast” edition this week – shooting for 800 or less.

Leading off: Not the best news for Clearwater

Early indications are that the two open seats on the Clearwater city council might be bought and paid for well in advance of the election. Two candidates with deep pocket connections have announced for the seats. They are 26-year-old Sam Wilson, a protégé of U.S. Rep. Anna Paulina Luna and Bianca Latvala, wife of County Commissioner Chris Latvala. Both Luna and Latvala can make it rain money, thus scaring off perhaps better qualified candidates. This happened some years back saddling Clearwater with a so-so Mayor instead of a much better qualified potential candidate who realized he couldn’t win against the avalanche of money a congressman could raise for his protégé. We hope we’re wrong, but in our mind, this race is over.

Tampa Bay, politics and notes:

Add Scientology critic Mark Bunker to the list of candidates in this August’s City Council race. Bunker will seek to regain a seat on the council after losing to Ryan Cotton two years ago. This time Bunker is trying for an open seat.

Clearwater’s long time Lincoln dealership on Gulf-to-Bay Blvd. has been purchased by Tasca and moved adjacent to its Buick dealership on US 19 in Palm Harbor. The Lincoln dealership dates back to the 50s when it was known as Carlisle-Porter Lincoln-Mercury.

So at this precise hour, is the Strait of Hormuz open or closed?

With the deadline now past, the IRS reports that tax refunds were up 24% over a year ago. Benefiting most from the tax changes are folks in the middle income brackets – good news.

Atlanta writer Tom Greene posed this question in The Atlanta Journal-Constitution a few weeks back: “Americans now use marijuana more than alcohol; is this new sobriety?” Out west they call it California Sober. Chilling.

Country thunder comes to Clearwater’s bayfront next month joining other star attractions like the big yellow duck that showed up some months back.

Number of the week: 4 million – the number of annual visitors at Philly’s Rocky statue – double the number of visitors at the city’s historic Liberty Bell.

With Lent behind us, our decluttering project (TBRR 2/22/26)) went very well. We cleared out over an item a day. The majority went to charity and a few items to the dumpster. We’re going to do it again next Lent – or sooner.

Born 100 years ago this week (April 21) in London was Britain’s revered Queen Elizabeth II.

Sports and random notes:

Someone we’d like to meet: Former Atlanta Braves second baseman and 1991 World Series hero, Mark Lemke.

In many ways, he was a twin to Lemke, scrappy infielder and manager Phil Garner passed away last week at age 76.

The Clearwater Lawn Bowls Club, a fixture in the city for over 100 years on North Fort Harrison Avenue, closed earlier this month. At one time, it was the largest such club in the United States with daily reports on the radio and international tournaments.

Another Dad joke, compliments of our friend TL: What is better than a counting horse? A spelling bee.

Topping the charts fifty years ago was The Jackson Five with ABC. Ten years earlier, in 1966, it was the Righteous Brothers on top with You’re My Soul and Inspiration.

One last thing: Airline profitability (5:05 version)

Normally, our items “borrowed” from the 5:05 Newsletter are two or three sentences, but the following long form was too good not to “borrow.”

In a bid to become more profitable, airlines are rumored to be eliminating flight attendants on all flights and instituting a new “Self-Serve Skies” initiative whereby your seat assignment will also include your passenger job description. For instance, passengers in Row 18 would be responsible for mid-flight trash pickup, while Row 12 would be tasked with operating the beverage cart. Passengers in Row 4 will be responsible making sure the overhead bins are completely closed while passengers in the Exit Rows must pass a 15-minute “YouTube Certification” on emergency slide deployment before takeoff. Furthermore, passengers will be required to pay a new $15 “Buoyancy Fee” if they want to have seat cushions that can be used as flotation devices in case of a water landing and a $20 fee to have the drop-down oxygen mask above their seat deployed in case of sudden decompression.

For those seeking a premium experience, "Job-Priority Boarding" is available for a $75 fee, allowing travelers to choose their labor and avoid being assigned to bathroom cleanup.

UP NEXT: HSN; Harper Lee; If we ruled the world

Sorry, time does not permit replies to comments.

041926/390